Showing posts with label italian sandwich. Show all posts
Showing posts with label italian sandwich. Show all posts

Friday, October 8, 2010

Pun Fun

It was a slow day for buffalo chicken moments - good for my patience but bad for the blog. Sure, I dealt with my fair share of surly elderly customers but that comes with the territory, especially on Wednesdays and Fridays. But really, things moved smoothly. I worked the line alone, had a few fun rushes, and saw a dozen of my favorite customers.

On days like this - a bit slow if not manageable and me maintaining a good mood - I take delight in one of my favorite linguistic exercises... punning. Here are a few of my favorite puns of the day.
  • With Cuban Black Bean Soup on the menu, I eagerly waited for the handful of customers who requested a "small black bean." Of course I knew what they wanted, but what they got was a small soup cup with a single black bean sitting at the bottom of the cup.
  • Between the temperate weather and a TGIF attitude, more than a few customers treated this day as a burger and fries day. My favorite game? When a customer requests a fry or a small fry. Once again, I know what they want. What do they get? A single french fry, size determined by their modifier.
  • Outside the bounds of a pun, I also have fun with passive aggressive questions. Here are a few examples: do you have a paper plate? Do you know what's in this sandwich? Do you know the soup of the day? I heard all three of these questions today. My answer? "Yes." And then I walk away.
I know I'm pushing my luck, but, especially on slow days, I really must keep myself entertained.

Speaking of being entertained, my colleagues and I sometimes find a few laughs in the expectations of our customers. Our standards are remarkably high for a cafe - we keep things fresh and prepared by expert cooks. But today, one of my colleagues was amused by a customer's question about whether or not our burgers are from grass fed cows. Sorry, folks, this isn't Per Se. I understand that the customer really wanted to know if the meat was organic, which is an easier question to field (pun intended, of course). But we aren't going to know that level of minutia. Likewise, I received a question about whether or not our salmon was caught in the last two days. We use very high quality product, but please

Friday, October 1, 2010

This Just Sounds Dirty! Couples Talk Panani

The storm that many weather people are calling epic slowed business almost to a halt today, but even a powerful front like the one that left freeways and city streets flooded, trees downed, and mass transit massively stalled, could not deliver a day free from buffalo chicken moments. While most potential customers stayed away, our old friend the unfortunately sexual sounding "panani" returned today in fine form.

A sweet couple (probably the other side of 55 and, based on my recent experience, probably visiting from the Midwest) entered the cafe under the watchful and professional guidance of one of my favorite regulars. Must be an important customer, I thought, so I did my best to put on the charm. Imagine the difficulty I faced during this exchange:

Kindly Woman: "Oh my, so many choices. You know, I think the panani looks very good. I'd like a panani."

David Thought Bubble: Must... keep... from... laughing.

Kindly Man: "Hmmm, what will I have? Everything looks so good but I really want a panani. Honey (thankfully to his wife, not me), I really want a panani."

David Thought Bubble: Don't we all. But really, this is too much...

Kindly Woman: "Oh, I know, the panani looks so good. That's what I'm having too."

David Thought Bubble: No one will ever believe this!

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I'm really not immature, I swear. This exchange was hilarious but out of respect for my regular, I kept my trademark snarky comments to myself and neglected to correct their pronunciation.

After my first entry on the panini/panani problem, one of my high school friends who also possesses far greater culinary knowledge than me shared a bit of cultural knowledge that I am happy now to pass along, quoting at length. I sincerely appreciate the info and hope you enjoy it as well:

"Panini is the plural Italian word for sandwich (panino usually refers to a small sandwich) and another reason to get annoyed... is when Americans add an "s" to the end of an Italian word ending in an "I" (Paninis, salamis, pepperonis, spaghettis)."

Thanks, S! If anyone ever has something to share, please let me know in the comments or by e-mail.